17 Funny Well-Timed Roast Lines That Humorously Mock & Burn People


A recent study revealed that on average about 45% of a person’s circle of friends consists of the so called “dangerous people”. That might be friends who are physically dangerous and sometimes aggressive (Don’t mess up with my buddy, I know taekwondo!).

Others have good positions in the society and special connections and status which allow them to dictate the rules in many situations. (Do you know who’s my daddy?)

The rest from the “dangerous group” use words as their weapons.

In this post, we give you a couple of examples of how those dangerous people hit their targets with words, get other people roasted and remain in control of each and every situation.


1. – “Dude, that song is old.”

– “Well, so is your mom, but you still listen to her. ”


2.  – “Can I buy you a drink?”

– “No, but I’ll take the money instead.


3.  – “Could I have your name?”

– ” Why don’t you already have one?”


4. Girl: “I am sooo fat. I need to lose weight. At least 10 pounds.”

Me: “Try taking off your makeup.”


5. Teacher: “From all this talking, I assume you’re done.”

Me: “From all this complaining, I assume you’re single.”


6. – “I liked your hair better when it was longer”.

– “Cool! I liked it better when you weren’t talking.”


7. – “I’d go through anything for you.”

– “Good! Let’s start with your bank account.”


8. Fat bully: “What are you staring at?”

Boy: “The reason why double doors were invested.”


9. – “I’ll go to the end of the world for you.”

-“Good! But would you stay there?”


10. Today a girl called me stupid.

I turned around and said “I think you’re right! I’m having trouble counting the fucks I give. I can’t get past zero.”


11. – “Is this seat empty?”

– “Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.”


12. – “So, baby, your place or mine?”

– “Both, You’ll go to your place and I’ll go to mine.”

13. – “You look like a dream.”

– “Then go back to sleep.”


14. – “Can I buy you a drink?”

– “Go ahead! But only if you buy my boyfriend one too!”


15. – “Where have you been all my life?”

– “For the first half of it, I probably wasn’t born yet!”



16. – “Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again”

– “Yeah, but this time don’t stop!.


17. – “You should learn how to take a joke.”

– “And you should learn how to make one.”




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